Struggles And All
by Emily Of The Dukes
Summary: The Rugrats are graduated now. Some are married and some are engaged. They are learning the struggles of what it's like to be an adult.
1. Returning Home To Bad News

_**The Rugrats are graduated now. Some are married and some are engaged. They are learning the struggles of what it's like to be an adult. **_

_**I don't own Rugrats/All Grown Up.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

_**Chapter One: Returning Home To Bad News.**_

Tommy and Lil were in Hawaii for their honeymoon. It was their last day there and Tommy was getting everything together for their plane ride back home. He walked into the bedroom to get Lil but she wasn't there. He looked around and smiled when he saw her standing on the balcony "Lillian, what are you doing out here?" he walked over and stood next to her.

"I'm taking in the view" she reached over and put her hand on his "This has been the best week of my life."

"Oh yeah?" he smiled and put his hand on her waist "Me too."

She looked up at him with a smile "I have really good news"

"What is it?"

She took his hands and put them on her stomach "I'm... We're going to have a baby." her smile grew as she looked up at him.

Tommy looked at her trying to register what she said. He pulled her into a hug and Lil let out a sigh of relief. He gave her a kiss before smiling "That's great, Lil. How do you think Phil will take it?"

Lil shrugged "We're twenty-one and married. He can deal with it."

Tommy laughed and looked at his watch "Come on, we don't want to be late."

Lil nodded and helped Tommy get their stuff to the car. Lil sighed once they got in and Tommy looked at her "What's wrong?"

"This place is just so beautiful. And soon, we'll be back in California."

Tommy laughed as they headed towards the airport "And we get to see our family and friends"

Lil rolled her eyes "Yeah, _great._" she laughed.

Tommy reached over and grabbed her hand "At least we have our own place away from them." Lil smiled and nodded in agreement.

* * *

Phil ran out of his room and ran to Kimi, who was in the kitchen "Lil comes back today!" he grabbed her shoulders and smiled at her.

Kimi laughed and pushed his hands away "I know, Phillip." she turned to walk away and sat on the couch "Have you really missed your sister _that _much?"

Phil looked at Kimi like she was crazy "Yes! That's my sister. My twin! We've never been apart for so long before!"

Kimi rolled her eyes "I'd take it you'll be there to pick her up?"

"Of course!" he jumped up "I can't wait to see her!"

"I can tell." Kimi laughed.

"Is Chuckie or Dil coming?" Phil asked.

Kimi shrugged "I think Chuckie's at work, I don't know about Dil."

"You think Dil is as excited to see his brother?"

Kimi shook her head "Dil is...Dil. He gets excited about aliens. Not his brother."

"I'm excited for the both of them. Mainly Lil, but you know."

Kimi laughed and turned to look at the time "We don't want to be late pick them up. Where's Grace?"

Grace was Phil and Kimi's daughter. She was a year old. Kimi and Phil are engaged, not because they have a kid, but Phil decided that after he saw how happy Tommy and Lil were when they got engaged that _he _wanted that with Kimi.

"She's in her playpen. I'll get her and meet you out in the car." Phil walked over to Grace as Kimi walked out the door to the car.

* * *

Tommy and Lil stepped off the plane and Lil stretched "If feels pretty nice to be back."

Tommy put an arm around her as they started walking towards the baggage claim "It does feel nice. Back to our home place."

"Phil and Kimi are picking us up." she said grabbing her bag.

"With Grace?"

Lil shrugged "I hope so."

Tommy smiled at her and they sat down to wait for Kimi and Phil "Just think, Grace will have a playmate this time next year."

"She will! I hope we have a girl." she put a hand on her stomach and smiled.

"I want a boy." he looked at her winked "If we get lucky, maybe we can have twins."

"Don't even go there, Pickles." she said with a laugh "But it is a possibility."

Tommy shook his head "I hope not. I'm going with a boy and that's final."

Lil was about to say something but was stopped by her name being yelled. She looked up and smiled. Phil was practically running towards her "Phillip!" she jumped up and ran to meet Phil.

"Lillian! I missed you!" he pulled Lil into a hug as Tommy walked over with the bags "T!" Phil let go of Lil and hugged Tommy.

"He's acted like a lost puppy since you two left." Kimi said with a laugh as she walked over with Grace.

Lil hugged her and whispered something to her, causing her to smile and pull her into a hug. Tommy smiled, knowing exactly what Lil told her. Kimi looked at him and then hugged him "Good job, T!"

"What's a good job?" Phil asked and the three of them shook their heads "Fine, but I will find out."

Lil put a hand on Phil's shoulder "You will. Late. When Dil and Chuckie are at the apartment"

Phil nodded as they walked to the car. Kimi handed Grace to Lil so she could be the one to put her in her car seat. The drive back was mainly consisted of Tommy and Lil telling them about their honeymoon and Kimi asking when they were going back to work.

They pulled up to the apartment and Lil got out and smiled "Missed home?" Kimi asked.

"Oh yes! But I wish it was cold."

"And by that, she means the heat in Hawaii is ten times hotter than this." Tommy said opening the trunk to get their bags.

Lil unlocked their apartment and walked in with a smile "Home sweet home"

"Lil? Where's Tommy?" Dil asked jumping off the couch.

"Dil? What are you doing here?"

"I have a spare key. I've been waiting for Tommy. I have something to tell him." Dil asked waiting for Tommy.

Phil, Kimi, Grace and Tommy came walking through the door "Hey D" Tommy said with a smile.

"Tommy, thank God! We have to go!"

Tommy looked at Dil, confused "Go where?"

"Right. You don't know. We didn't want to ruin your honeymoon, but dad is in the hospital."


	2. Staying Strong

**_Chapter Two: Staying Strong_**

Lil has never seen Tommy move so fast in her life. Family was the most important thing to him. She watched him and Dil go to the car. She looked at Kimi and Phil "I'm going to go with them" She ran down the hall, trying to catch up with them. She made it to the car before they left and she got in the backseat.

The three of them were sitting in the waiting room. Tommy was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. Lil was rubbing his back trying to keep him calm. He looked over at Dil "What happened?"

Dil sighed "He was in a bad car wreck."

Lil looked at Tommy and could see tears. Tommy wasn't one to cry, so it broke her heart. She grabbed his hand and he looked at her "Thank's for being here."

She leaned over and gave him a kiss "It's not a problem at all."

He looked at Dil "Where's mom?"

"In the room with dad. She told me to get you and then come back. She said we had to talk about something, but I don't know what." Tommy turned to Lil, he knew what Didi had to talk to them about. She could see the fear in his eyes. Dil looked at him "T, what's that look for?"

"Nothing, Dil." Lil started to rub his back again, trying to calm him down.

A few more minutes passed and Didi came walking out. Tommy jumped up and ran over to her "Mom? Is dad okay?"

"Oh Tommy, thank God you're here!" she pulled him into a hug.

"Is dad going to be okay?" Tommy was on the verge of tears. Lil walked over and gave Didi a hug before standing by Tommy.

Dil joined them and looked at his mom "What do we need to talk about?"

"Your father, as you know, Dil, he's connect to life-support and has been in a coma since the day he's gotten here. The doctors have said there are no signs of improvement and he's brain-dead..." She looked at Tommy before she continued "We, as a family, have to decide if we want to... Pull the plug or not." Didi almost started crying again.

Lil looked up at Tommy and saw that he now had tears running down his face "What about Uncle Drew and Angelica? Don't they have a say?"

"I've already talked to Drew. He wants to do whatever is best" Didi put a hand on Tommy's shoulder.

"What are we supposed to decide? That's our dad!" Dil said.

Lil was holding Tommy's arm and listening. She _knew _this was breaking their hearts. This is probably one of the hardest decisions a person would have to make.

Tommy started to talk "What are we going to do? We can't let him go..I mean, I don't want to just see him laying in a hospital bed every single day. But I don't want to lose my dad."

"I know, Tommy. But we have to do what's best."

Dil looked at his mom, tears in his eyes "Are you saying what I think you are?"

Didi nodded slowly "It's a hard decision, but both you boys know this is the best decision." she walked away before either of them could protest. She walked over to Stu's doctors and started talking to them.

"I'm so sorry, Tommy" Lil said looking up at him. She pulled him into a hug and let him cry on her shoulder.

He pulled away and looked at her "If you tell Phil I was crying, I will hurt you." he forced a laugh.

Lil smiled and laughed. She wiped away the stray tears before putting her hand on his cheek "No promises." she gave him a quick kiss.

Dil walked over to them "This is going to be real hard."

Tommy nodded and put an arm around Lil "At least we have some of the best friends, and wife, to be there for us."

Lil gave Dil a hug for support and then stood back by Tommy as Didi walked over to them "They are going to take him off life-support and said it could be a few minutes, hours or even a day before he... Passes."

Tommy took a deep breath and nodded. Lil put an arm around his waist and she looked at Didi "If you need anything, my mom is more than willing to help."

Didi gave her a smile "Thank you, Lil. I'm going to call Drew."

Tommy looked at Lil as they sat back down "I know I've already said this; but thank you. It really means a lot."

Lil reached over and took his hand "You're my husband. I wouldn't make you go through this alone."

He gave her a kiss before looking over at Dil "How are you, Dil?"

"I'll be fine, T." Dil sighed and sake down in his chair.

Didi walked back over and sat by Dil. She looked at Tommy and Lil "You two look exhausted. You should go home and sleep. I know you just got back today."

Tommy nodded and walked over to his mom and gave her a hug and kissed her cheek "Call me if anything happens."

Tommy and Lil walked out of the hospital hand-in-hand "Are you going to be okay?" she asked him.

He looked down at her and smiled "I will be. As long as I have you by my side." he took a deep breath trying to keep himself from crying anymore. "But a change of subject, have you scheduled an appointment for the baby?"

Lil forced a smile "Not yet. But I am when we get home." she gave Tommy a kiss before opening her car door and getting in.


	3. Good News And Bad News

_**Chapter Three: Good News And Bad News.**_

Lil told Kimi and Phil what happened and they did their best to not say anything about it. Tommy was sitting in the living room and would get nervous every time he heard a phone ring, thinking it was his mom with bad news. Lil was sitting next to him on the couch and she was trying to think of a good way to tell Phil the good news. She just couldn't find the right time with what was going on.

It was one in the morning, Tommy and Lil were asleep when Tommy's phone started ringing. He groaned and picked it up "Hello?" he mumbled. He then sat up and turned the light on "Mom, slow down. What's going on?"

Lil rolled over, rubbing her eyes. She looked up at him with a curious look. She watched as Tommy's face fell, full of heartbreak. He gout out of bed as he hung the phone up "Tommy, what's going on?"

He turned and looked at her, momentarily forgetting she was even there. He pulled on a shirt and then looked at her again "My dad.. He's... Gone."

Lil brought a hand up to her mouth "Tommy..."

She knew he was doing his best not to cry in front of her again. She got up and walked over to him, tears in her eyes "I'm so sorry" she threw her arms around his neck. He wrapped his around her wait and pulled her close.

"I'm going to see my mom and Dil..." he gave her a kiss "I'll call you later, okay?"

"Are you sure you don't want me there?"

"Of course I want you there. But I think my mom will want some time with us." he sighed and shrugged.

"I understand. Call me if you need anything." she kissed him and followed him to the door.

He walked down the hall to the car and Lil walked up the stairs to Phil and Kimi's apartment. She knew neither of them would be awake so she used her spare key to get in. She walked into the bedroom and walked to his side of the bed. She tapped his shoulder until he woke up and looked at her "Lillian, what do you want?"

"I need my brother." Phil shot up when he heard her crying.

He took her arm and walked out to the living room "What did that douche of a husband do to you? I _will _kill him, Lillian."

Lil let out a small laugh before hitting his arm "He didn't do anything. And be nice! It's Stu... He... He's gone."

Phil looked at her "I take back what I said about Tommy. Where is he?"

Lil fell onto the couch "He went to be with Didi and Dil."

Phil sat down next to her "I can't believe it."

"I know... We've known him our whole lives. I just... I just can't imagine how Tommy or Dil must be feeling."

Phil put an arm around his sister "It'll be okay. I'm sure Tommy being Tommy will act strong around Dil and Didi and then have a breakdown when he's either alone or with you. Just like he was when Charlotte died."

Lil shrugged "I don't know, Phil. I mean, when he found out about it he was a mess."

Phil smiled and looked at her "He cried?"

"You didn't hear it from me." she laughed "But yes. This is different than Charlotte. This is his dad."

"I know, Lillian. But the Pickles are a strong family. They can get through it."

Lil sighed "I do have some good news though. I've been waiting to tell you."

Phil looked at her and raised an eyebrow "What could your good news be?"

Lil smiled at him "Congratulations, Phillip DeVille, you're going to be an uncle"

* * *

Tommy walked into his old house and up stairs to Dil's room. He knocked before walking in. Dil was sitting in his chair by his computer and there was a girl on his bed. "Tommy!" Dil ran over to him and gave him a hug "Where's Lil? Didn't you bring her?"

He shook his head "I figured mom would just want her sons as company now." he looked at the girl on Dil's bed "And who is your friend?"

"Oh, Tommy, this is Brittany, my girlfriend. Brittany, this is my older brother, Tommy."

Brittany got off the bed and walked over to Tommy, shaking his hand "It's nice to meet you and I am so sorry for your loss."

"Thanks." he gave her a smile and then turned to Dil "Is mom in her room?"

Dil nodded and went back to sitting in the chair. Tommy shut the door and walked to his moms room. He knocked and slowly opened it "Mom?" he saw his mom asleep and he didn't want to wake her. He shut the door and made his way over to his old room. He sat on the bed and pulled his phone out, calling Lil. He needed anything to keep his mind off his dad.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Three days later Phil, Lil, Kimi, Chuckie and Grace were at Tommy's. Lil pulled him into a big hug and gave him a kiss. Kimi hugged him next, and then Phil and Chuckie. It was the day of Stu's funeral and as soon as Drew and Angelica got there they were heading to the church.

Tommy looked at Lil when they sat in the church pews "I don't think I can give a speech."

Lil put a hand on his shoulder "You can do it."

He smiled at her as the Priest started talking. He grabbed her hand and tried to listen. Dil was sitting on the other side of Tommy next to their mom, who was in tears. Phil, Kimi and Chuckie were doing their best to stay strong for Tommy. Phil and Chuckie found it harder than Kimi did because they had known Stu literally their whole lives.

The burial service was a private one. Only the Pickles, Finster's and DeVille's were allowed. They were all trying to hold themselves together for Didi's sake.

After the burial was done, Didi just wanted to get home. Dil rode with Drew, Didi and Angelica back to his house. Tommy, Lil, Phil and Chuckie stayed behind "How are you holding up, T?" Chuckie asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." he gave Chuckie a reassuring smile as they started walking their cars.

"How about everyone come to mine and Tommy's place?" Lil asked putting her arm through Tommy's.

"Yeah, we planned on it." Phil said with a laugh.

"Count me in." Chuckie said with a smile.


	4. Baby Talk

_**Chapter Four: Baby Talk**_

Tommy, Lil, Kimi, Phil and Chuckie were all sitting in the living room of Tommy and Lil's apartment.

"Do you guys have anything to drink?" Phil asked from the floor, looking at Lil and Tommy.

"Depends. What do you want?" Lil asked.

"What do you think?" he smiled at her.

"I think the boy wants beer." Kimi laughed and set Grace down beside her.

Tommy stood up and walked over to the fridge. He got two beers out and handed one to Phil, keeping the other one. Kimi stopped drinking after Grace was born and Chuckie never drank, so he didn't bother asking either of them if they wanted something.

"Oh, Chuckie! You're the only one besides Dil and parents who don't know I'm pregnant!" Lil said with a smile.

"Congrats, Lil!" Chuckie turned to Tommy "Good job, T. What do you want it to be?"

"A boy." Tommy said.

"A girl." Lil said and then gave Tommy a smile.

Phil looked at them "Lillian, I think you're having twins."

Lil and Tommy both looked at him and Kimi elbowed him. Chuckie laughed "Why would you think that?" Lil asked.

Phil smiled "Twins run in our family. Kimi and I didn't have them, so you most likely are."

Lil shook her head "No, I don't want twins. Being a twin is hard enough!"

Tommy, Kimi and Chuckie were trying to keep from laughing. "Being my twin isn't hard. Being _your _twin on the other hand is tough!"

"Oh come on, Phillip. Being my twin is a piece of cake!"

"Is not, Lillian!"

"Name _one _time being my twin was hard!"

"I could name a million times!"

Lil crossed her arms and leaned back "I'm waiting."

Phil thought about it before smiling and pointing "Okay, I got it. In fifth grade when you blackmailed me into dressing like you to break up with Jeffery."

Tommy laughed "I remember that!"

Kimi smiled and looked at Phil "I can't believe you would actually do that."

Chuckie turned to look at Tommy and Lil "You know, T. That's when I found out you had secret feelings for Lil."

Tommy smiled and put an arm around her "How?"

"You said Phil looked good as a girl. Which technically is saying Lil looks good."

"I have another one!" Phil said putting their attention back on them "You broke Wally and me up."

Lil shrugged "True, but if I didn't you wouldn't have gotten with Kimi."

Phil smiled at Kimi before giving her a quick kiss "That's the good thing that came out of being your twin."

Lil smiled and stretched out of the couch. She put her head in Tommy's lap and turned so she was facing everyone "Back to the talk about the baby, I don't care what it is or how many there are, I'm just excited to be a mom."

Phil smiled at his sister "You'll be a good mom, Lillian."

"Thank you, Phillip." Lil said. She made herself comfortable by turning on her side. Tommy started messing with her hair. Lil sighed and closed her eyes. It had been a rough four days for them, but Lil knew that they would get past this with no problem.

* * *

Weeks went by and everyone was getting past Stu's death. Lil was standing in her bathroom getting ready to go to her first appointment for her baby, or even babies. She sighed and looked at herself in the mirror. Lil had always been really skinny. She worked out all the time. She figured if she _was _having twins, she'd start showing sooner than she would if there was just one. And she was showing. She had a small baby bump, but nothing too bad.

Tommy walked into the bathroom so he could brush his teeth and he smiled when he saw Lil looking at herself. He crossed his arms and leaned on the door frame. Lil turned to look at him "Can you tell?"

Tommy looked down at her stomach and shook his head "Barley." he put his hands on her waist "You're going to make a beautiful pregnant woman."

She smiled and kissed him before backing away and pointing at the sink "Brush your teeth."

Tommy rolled his eyes "That's why I came in here. But _someone _was hogging the sink." he said smiling at her.

Lil returned his smile before walking out and into the living room to wait for him. She was sitting on the couch watching TV and waiting for Tommy to get ready. She put a hand on her stomach and smiled. She was about to find out if she was having twins or not. Every one was pretty convinced that she was. And in a way, it made her happy. Tommy came walking out of the bedroom and smiled at her "You ready?"

"I am!" she said standing up off the couch and walking towards him "Just think.. In eleven more weeks we can find out the gender." she said with a smile.

"I can't wait." he said opening the door for her and walked out after her.

Tommy drove them to the office and Lil was all smiles as she walked in.

They sat in the waiting room and Lil was looking through one of the magazine until her doctor came out "Lillian, are you ready?" She smiled and nodded, setting the magazine down, and stood up. She grabbed Tommy's hand and practically dragged him to the room.

At the end of the appointment Lil smiled, happy with how it went. She looked at her doctor "Is it possible to get a picture of the ultrasound?"

Her doctor smiled "Would you like one?"

"I would love one!" she said getting off the table.

The doctor gave her a picture of the ultrasound and her and Tommy were on their way home. Instead of going to their apartment, they went up to Phil and Kimi's. She opened the door and Phil and Kimi turned to look at her "How'd it go?" Lil smiled and walked over tot he couch handing them the picture.

"We're having twins."

Phil got off the couch and pulled Lil into a hug. When he pulled away he held his hand out "I told you." Lil rolled her eyes and reached into her purse for her wallet, and handed Phil twenty dollars. He had bet her that she was going to have twins or not. "Thank you very much, Lillian. Enjoy your twins."


	5. Could Things Get Any Worse?

_**Months have gone by between this chapter and the last one. :)**_

_**Chapter Five: Could Things Get Any Worse?**_

Phil woke up one morning with an excruciating pain in his chest. He groaned and moved one of his hands so it was now on his chest. He felt another hand on his arm and he opened his eyes and looked over at Kimi. He gave her a smile and she propped herself up on her arms and looked at him "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." he turned his head so he was now looking at her "Why do you ask?"

Kimi shrugged before getting out of bed "You sounded like you were in pain. I just wanted to make sure you were okay." she walked out of the room.

Phil watched her walk out of the room before he sat up. The pain still hadn't gone away and it was starting to really bother him. He took a deep breath before getting out of bed and walking towards the kitchen. The pain was slowly going away and it started to ease up as he walked.

He put his elbow on the table and rested his face in his hand and closed his eyes. Kimi was saying something to him but he didn't register what it was. She turned to look at him before shaking his shoulder "Phil? Why are you so tired?"

Phil opened his eyes and looked at Kimi before sighing "I have no idea." he took his elbow off the table and stood up "Will you make me some breakfast?"

Kimi rolled her eyes and gave him a quick kiss "Sure. Will you get Grace?"

Phil nodded and walked to Grace's room and took her out of her crib "Morning Gracie." Grace made a happy noise and smiled at him. He returned it and walked out into the kitchen and put her in her high chair.

He sat down at the table again and took a deep breath, holding it in because a pain shot through his chest again. He closed his eyes and waited for the pain to pass. When he opened his eyes he realized he was gasping for air. Kimi turned around quickly and walked over to him "What's wrong with you today?"

Phil laughed at himself and rolled his eyes. How could he have forgotten to breathe? He looked at Kimi and could see the worry and concern in her eyes "I just forgot to breath."

Kimi rolled her eyes and went back to the stove to finish the breakfast. Phil wasn't sure if he should tell Kimi about the pain or not, but for now he decided he wasn't going to tell her. He would wait it out the day and if the pain was still there come the next day he would tell her.

"Do you work today?" Kimi asked setting a plate in front of him.

He nodded before taking a bite "Sadly."

Since Phil wasn't going to college, the closest thing to a good job he could get was at Target. It was right down the road from where they lived so he didn't complain. He was able to bring money home for Kimi and Grace so he didn't care where he worked. "How late are you working until?"

Phil thought about it "I think until close. I'm not sure. But I'll know when I get there and I'll let you know."

Kimi walked over to the cabinet and got down some of Grace's baby food and started feeding it to her. "I hope it's not too late. That would be a what? Eight hour shift?"

Phil shrugged "I'll be making the money." he smiled and put his plate away "I'm going to go see Lil." he gave Kimi a kiss before walking out of the apartment and down to Lil and Tommy's.

He didn't bother knocking anymore, since this is his sister. He opened the door and walked in. He could hear talking going on from the kitchen so he walked in "Good morning"

Lil turned around from the sink and gave him a smile "Morning Phil"

Tommy looked over at him from the table "Morning."

Lil looked at Phil and raised an eyebrow "Did you get any sleep? You look really tired."

Phil sat at the table across from Tommy and nodded "I did. I just feel really tired today."

"And you have work?" Lil asked.

Phil nodded and sighed "Again I say; sadly."

Lil used to work at the Starbucks that was inside the Target. They had gotten their jobs at the same time. The only difference was that Lil was in college and could do something with her life once she graduated. She had switched to online school once her and Tommy got married so she wouldn't have to worry about missing school. And now that she was pregnant, online school was best for her.

Tommy was listening to their conversation. He wasn't working, but he was in school. He took the week off for his honeymoon and then a few days after Stu had died, but he was back in school now. He was going for directing, like he'd always wanted to be. He looked over at Lil "Are you going to have time for school when the babies are born?"

Lil laughed and nodded "I think so. I think I can manage two babies and school work at the same time." Phil was leaning on the table. He had his face in his hand and he had fallen asleep. Again. Lil looked over at him and nudged him "If you're so tired go back to bed." she laughed.

Tommy stood up and kissed her cheek "I'm going to shower before I leave for school."

Lil nodded and watched him walk away. Lil sat next to Phil and looked at him "Are you feeling okay?"

He sighed and leaned back in his chair "Yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

She shrugged but didn't take her eyes off of him "You look sick."

Phil shook his head and stood up "I feel fine. But really tired." he started walking towards the door and called out a goodbye and said that he would see her later before walking out the door and back to his apartment.

He was getting ready for work and that pain in his chest was back. He tried to ignore it and went back to changing. He pulled on his red t-shirt and turned to see Kimi "You've worked until close every night."

"It's fine with me." he said wrapping his arms around Kimi's waist and giving her a kiss.

"But it's not fine with me. No wonder you're so tired and out of it." she pulled away and sat on the bed.

Phil sat next to her and put his shoes on before turning to look at her "I'll see you tonight." he gave her another kiss and walked out of the apartment.

* * *

Phil had only been at work for a few hours and that pain in his chest was back; only this time it was more frequently. Just a few minutes ago it was so bad his vision even started to blur. He thanked God he wasn't with a customer at the time. He was standing at the end of his lane waiting for someone to walk over. He was leaned against the conveyor belt when someone waved a hand in front of his face.

He shook his head slowly and looked at who it was. Lil. "I've been saying your name for the past five minutes"

Phil thought about it. He doesn't remember her saying his name "Yeah, sorry. I was just zoned out." he gave Lil his best smile. The pain in his chest was worse now and he was clenching his teeth, he didn't want Lil to notice though.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah. I've just been standing too long." Phil wasn't even sure why he was lying to his own sister. He knew if he were to tell her she'd force him to go to the hospital, but he didn't think it was anything too serious. "Why did you need me?"

Lil held something up "I was planning on buying something." she said with a smile.

Phil laughed. That was the only reason she would bother him while at work. He didn't even think before he asked her what she needed. He went to turn around but Lil grabbed his shoulder and made him stay facing her. She lifted her hand up and put it against his forehead. He gave her a weird look and pushed her hand away "What are you doing?"

"I was making sure you don't have a fever. You just look sick." she shrugged and started walking towards the register after handing Phil what she was buying.

"Is this your lunch?" Phil didn't even want to think about lunch. Just the thought of food made him nauseous which was weird for him. He was _always _hungry.

Lil nodded and took it from him "Come home at your lunch time." she said to him as he walked around so he could get back to leaning on the conveyor belt.

He smiled at her and nodded and was about to walk away from her but a pain shot through his chest. Worse than before. And he thought the last time was bad. He grabbed onto the counter, his knuckles turning white. Lil set down what she had just bought and looked at her brother "Phil?"

He had tears running down his face now. He couldn't hold it back anymore, the pain was too much. Phil couldn't bring himself to answer her as another pain surges through his chest. His other hand shot up to grab his chest, hoping that it would make the pain go away.

"Phil, take it easy, what's wrong?" Phil could feel her grabbing hold of him now. His knees began to buckle and Lil was practically holding him up.

He took a deep breath before speaking "I...It... Hurts."

"Phillip, please just take it easy. What hurts?"

"My chest... Really... Hurts." Phil felt horrible. He tried to keep his mind off the pain. It wasn't until he saw his sisters worried eyes above him. He had no idea he was even on the ground. He could tell there was another person there but he couldn't find the strength in him to move his head and see who it was. He could hear Lil yelling at whoever it was to call an ambulance, he could hear her voice break and it freaked him out.

He realized it was getting harder and harder to breath and black spots were dancing around his vision. He took one last glance at his sister before everything went blank.


	6. Waiting For Forever

**_Chapter Six: Waiting For Forever_**

Phil opened his eyes slowly. He blinked a couple times and stared at the ceiling. He realized the chest in his pain wasn't as bad anymore and that's when he looked at his arm and noticed an IV. Phil started moving, he didn't want to be in this bed anymore. He tried to sit up but he started feeling dizzy. He felt a pair of hands on his shoulders pushing him back down. He looked over at who it was and saw Lil.

Her eyes were red and he knew she had been crying. "You scared me so bad, Phillip."

"What's wrong with me?" he asked.

Lil shrugged and sat on his bed "They took some x-rays of your chest and we're waiting for the results. You're hooked to and IV that's giving you drugs to keep the pain down a little."

Phil gave her a smile "I'm fine, Lillian. Promise."

Lil looked at her brother. Losing him was the last thing she'd ever even think about. She could see it in his eyes that he was lying about being fine, she knew he wasn't. She had tears in his eyes again as she stood up "There's some people waiting to see you." she said as she started walking towards the door "I'll be back."

Phil put his head down and stared back up at the ceiling. He didn't mean to scare his sister. He didn't want to scare her. He sighed as he thought about what happened. He should have told someone about the pain when it first started but it was never bad. He didn't think it was anything serious.

Someone walked in the room and he hoped it was Lil but when he looked towards the door he saw a doctor instead. "Good to see you're awake, Phillip."

Phil gave her a smile and shrugged a little "I wouldn't stay out forever, Dr. C. What's wrong with me?"

Dr. Carmichael walked over and stood by Phil. She looked down at this boy she's known since he was a baby and could feel her own tears started to form. Phil knew something was wrong with him by the look on her face. He braced himself for whatever it was she was about to tell him. He watched as Dr. Carmichael took a deep breath before she started talking. Phil glanced towards the door and saw Lil standing there with Kimi and Grace. He put his full attention back on Dr. Carmichael "You have a valve malfunction on both your left and right side of your heart. In other words, your heart is failing."

"How bad is it?" Phil asked. He could feel his hands starting to shake.

"Since we didn't catch it sooner it's pretty serious now."

Phil nodded slowly taking in what he was just told. "What now?" he asked softly.

"I talked to Dr. Robinson, he'll be here to talk to you in a few minutes. Medication won't do much for you now, so the only way is transplant. You've been put on the donor list."

Phil wanted to ask how long it would be if he didn't get a transplant but he didn't want to know. He thanked Dr. Carmichael and stared at the wall blankly before Kimi and Lil walked over to him. Lil helped Phil sit up slowly before she threw her arms around his neck, tears running down her face. He wrapped his arms around her. He didn't even want to look at Kimi. He knew her heart was breaking over this.

He let go of Lil and then he felt someone touching his legs. He looked down and saw Grace crawling towards him. He smiled and reached out for her "Hi Gracie"

She put her arms around his neck, giving him a hug. She had no idea what was going on but she could tell everyone around her was upset. He finally looked over at Kimi before motioning for her to come over to him. She slowly walked towards him before he put a hand on her waist and pulled her to him. She was sobbing into his shoulder and he was trying not to cry. He started rubbing her back "I'm going to be okay, Kim."

She took a deep breath before pulling away to look at him. He gave her a smile and she put a hand on his cheek "I know you will be."

Lil was leaning against the wall. She didn't know what to say. She didn't want to think about her brother possibly dying soon. He's twenty-one, he hasn't even done half the things he's wanted to. She wanted to see her brother get married, she wanted him to be able to meet his nieces/nephews when they were born. She had one of her hands up to her mouth and was staring at the ground. She felt someone's hand on her shoulder and she turned to see Tommy. She sighed and threw herself into his arms.

* * *

Lil had finally calmed down. She told Tommy what was wrong with Phil and stayed by his side everyday until he was better. Phil was sleeping and Lil turned to Tommy "I hope he's going to be okay."

Tommy had an arm around her and he kissed her cheek "This is Phil we're talking about. He'll be okay."

She could feel the tears starting to form again but she managed to hold them back "He's just like our mom. He tries to stay strong no matter what. I overheard him talking to Dr. Carmichael earlier and he said this pain in his chest had been going on for a while but he didn't think it was bad." the tears she was holding back now started to fall "And now it's so bad he might not even make it."

Phil had woken up and listened to her. He turned his head to look at her "I'm going to make it, Lillian." he forced a smile "You aren't losing me anytime soon."

Dr. Carmichael walked into the room "How are you feeling, Phil?"

"I'm feeling pretty good. The pain ins't here and I've been able to sleep." She gave him a smile "How long... How long do you think it would take to find a transplant?"

"There's no telling. But hopefully we'll get you one soon." she gave him one last smile before she walked out.

* * *

Days had passed and there wasn't a new heart to get for Phil. He was back to himself, making jokes and eating all the time. But he was stuck in the hospital in that bed. Lil and Kimi were there every day so he always had someone to talk to. They had hope that he would get a new heart soon.

Kimi and Lil had left the room to go get something to drink and to talk to Dr. Carmichael. She told them that they had contacted other hospitals saying they needed this heart A.S.A.P. It upset Lil that this was happening to her brother, but he knew he was strong and would get through this.

They were walking back to the room when a bunch of nurses and doctors ran by them with machines, Dr. Carmichael being part of it. The two looked at each other before they started running towards Phil's room. One of the doctors stopped them from going in. They wouldn't even tell them what happened, but they had an idea.

Lil broke down. Kimi grabbed her so she wouldn't end up on the ground. Phil had flat lined. He was fine before they left. Lil was sobbing and Kimi was doing her best to calm her down. She watched as they tried to get his heart going again. She was standing there, holding her best and saying a prayer in hear head that something good would happen. That Phil would come back. That they'd get him a heart.

She looked down at her best friend. She knew this wasn't good for her, or her babies. She needed to calm her down but didn't know how. She couldn't think straight.

"Kimi? What happened?"

Kimi turned her head to look at whoever was talking to her. Tommy was walking over with Grace. She did a sigh of relief "It's Phil. You need to calm Lil down"

Tommy set Grace down before looking in the room and saw what was going on. He looked over at Lil before putting his arms around her and pulling her close. He turned her away from the room she couldn't watch. She tried to protest but she couldn't get any words out past her sobs. He couldn't think of anything to say to calm her down so he just held her and watched the doctors try to bring back her brother.


	7. Miracles And Hearts

**_This chapter is short for certain reasons. More drama coming, get ready :) _**

**_Chapter Seven: Miracles And Hearts._**

"You gave us quite a scare when you flat lined, Phillip." Dr. Carmichael said to Phil as she checked all the tubes that were connected to him.

Phil smiled and shrugged "I know. But hey, there was nothing I could do about it. I told you I wouldn't stay out long."

Dr. Carmichael laughed before looking at him "How's that new heart treating you?"

"Pretty good. I feel great, the heart isn't giving me any problems."

Phil was ready to go home. He had the surgery, did his physical therapy and had spent almost twenty days there for the recovery. He laid back down and stared at the ceiling. The next day he'd be back at home and everything could go back to normal. Lil was mad at him for scaring her so bad, but she'd get over it since he's okay now.

"I'll see you in the morning" Dr. Carmichael said with a smile as she walked out of the room.

Phil was laying in his bed just staring at the ceiling or the wall. It's not like he had anything else to do. There was nothing he could really do besides stare at something. He had a room without a TV so it was also really quiet. He decided that the faster he goes to sleep, the faster he could go home.

* * *

Phil was standing at the counter, Kimi by his side. He was signing the papers so he could go home. Kimi had an arm wrapped around his waist and she had a smile on her face. She was happy to have him coming home. Grace felt upset that he wasn't home either.

Before they left the hospital Dr. Carmichael got onto him having to take his medicine and come in for appointments. He smiled at her and said he wouldn't miss any of them. Phil and Kimi walked out to the car and Phil threw his hands in the air "It feels so good to be outside"

"You'll get over that soon." she said rolling her eyes "Lil's all kinds of ready for you to come home."

"I've missed her. How is she?"

"She's good."

Lil was about to be eight months pregnant. Phil felt bad for missing all of the seventh month of her pregnancy, but it's not like anything important happened. He looked over at her "How are the babies? Any names yet?"

Lil found out that she was having two girls. Her and Tommy had no idea what names they wanted to give them, but hopefully that had names picked out now. "Actually, yes."

"What are they?"

Kimi smiled at Phil "Lil said she wants to keep it a surprise from you." she started driving towards their home and Phil bothered her the whole way to tell him what the names were.

He walked through the door of Lil and Tommy's apartment "Lillian, what are the names?"

Lil came walking out of the kitchen and over to Phil she gave him a hug "I'm so glad you're back and okay"

"Me too. I just want to know the names" Phil pouted and sat on her couch.

"You'll find out when the babies come."

Phil groaned and leaned back into the couch as Tommy came walking out with Grace. He set her down and Grace ran over to Phil and jumped into his laugh "Daddy!"

Phil smiled and picked her up "Gracie!" he gave her a kiss on the cheek "I missed you"

"Miss you too!" he set her on the ground and she went back to the back of the apartment to where her toys were.

Phil put his feet up on the coffee table and put his hands behind his head "It's so good to be back"

"If I wasn't so worn out, I'd kick your feet off the table." Lil said leaning back and putting her hands on her stomach.

Kimi turned to look at Lil "You're getting a c-section, right?"

"Oh, hell yeah." Lil said smiling at Kimi.

Lil was leaning back into the couch and she was staring at her stomach. She couldn't tell what it was but she had been uncomfortable lately. She was just having a weird feeling. She couldn't tell what it was, but she felt like something else was going to go wrong soon.


	8. Bring On The Babies

_**Chapter Eight: Bring On The Babies**_

Lil kept moving around one night. She just couldn't get comfortable. Something didn't feel right to her. She was eight and a half months pregnant. She moved again and accidentally kicked Tommy, waking him up. He stretched before turning to look at her "What's wrong?"

Lil gave him a small smile "I didn't mean to wake you."

Tommy smiled at her "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I can't get comfortable." She pouted and threw her hands on the bed.

Tommy sat up so he was now next to her "Do you think it's a good kinds of uncomfortable? Like.. Babies are coming?"

Lil laughed and shook her head "I'll call my midwife in the morning and see what she says. I just want to sleep."

Tommy reached over and put a hand on her stomach and gave her a smile before leaning over and giving her a kiss "Maybe tomorrow will be a good day for us"

She nodded her head in agreement and laid down, trying to get comfortable. Tommy was still sitting up and he watched her adjust herself. She groaned when she couldn't get comfortable and threw the covers off her "That's it"

Tommy raised an eyebrow at her as she walked out of the room. "Lillian, what are you doing?" he called to her.

"Calling my midwife now. I can't take it anymore"

Tommy walked into the room "It's three in the morning. She's probably asleep"

"I don't care. She said I could call her whenever I had a question so I am." she put the phone up to her ear and waited for someone to answer. Once her midwife answered she started talking to her and asked her what she should do.

Tommy was sitting on the couch watching Lil walk back and forth while talking. She smiled when she hung up and walked back to the bedroom. He waited and a few minutes later she walked back out and threw his coat at him "She said to go to the hospital."

Tommy groaned and stood up. He looked at Lil before smiling "You're lucky I love you."

She smiled big and gave him a kiss before she opened the door and walked out. "Shouldn't we tell Phil and Kimi?"

Lil stopped walking and turned around, Tommy wasn't paying attention and almost ran into her "We are not telling Phil and Kimi about this until after they are born."

Tommy took a step back and gave her a nervous smile "Yeah, okay. Whatever you want" she grabbed his hand and took him to the car.

* * *

Phil walked into Tommy and Lil's apartment after he woke "Lil!" he walked around the apartment and sighed when he couldn't find her. He had to go to the hospital today for a check-up on his heart. He wanted Lil to go with him, but apparently her and Tommy had gone somewhere. He shrugged and then walked out.

Kimi was walking by when he shut the door "Is Lil coming?"

Phil shook his head "I don't even know where they went."

Kimi laughed and pushed him forward "Come on. You're going to be late."

"But I want my sister there."

Kimi rolled her eyes and laughed but kept walking "Too bad, Phil. Walk"

They arrived at the hospital and Kimi and Phil were talking to Dr. Carmichael since she was the one in charge of making sure Phil kept up with his medications and appointments. They were walking down the hall when a doctor rushed by them. Dr. Carmichael watched which direction she was running in and sighed. "What was that about?" Kimi asked.

Dr. Carmichael gave them both a sad look "He's one of the obstetricians that helps deliver babies." she started walking again "He gets paged when something goes wrong during delivery."

Kimi put her hand up to her heart "That's so sad."

"It is. That's why I didn't choose to work in that field." she gave them a smile and was about to turn into their room but through the doors where the delivery area was Phil saw someone walk out of the room before the doors closed.

"Tommy?" he started walking towards the doors to see if it really was him.

Kimi and Dr. Carmichael both watched him walk in the direction. Kimi followed and grabbed his arm "Phil, what are you doing?"

The doors closed and he couldn't see anymore. He turned around to face Kimi before walking over to the desk instead, Kimi right behind him. "Excuse me. Is Lillian Pickles back there?"

The lady typed her name on the computer before she looked up at him "She is. Are you a family member?"

"I'm her twin. And I'd like to see my sister"

She motioned for them to go back there and they did. Tommy was standing outside the door leaned up against the wall. "Tommy, what's going on?"

He turned to look at them and they could see it in his eyes that something was wrong "What are you doing here?" he asked them pushing himself off the wall.

"I had an appointment for my heart and I saw you. What's wrong?"

Tommy looked down and sighed. He ran a hand through his hair. Phil and Kimi could both tell that he had been crying before they walked over and they in a way had an idea as to why, but they wanted to be sure. "One of... One of the twins passed away. The other is in the NICU, and it isn't looking good."

"Oh my God, Tommy. I'm so sorry" Kimi said throwing her arms around his neck.

"Is Lil still in the room?"

Tommy nodded and Phil walked past him and into the room. Lil was laying in her bed on her side. Phil could hear her crying from the door. He slowly walked over to her "Lil?"

"Just yesterday they were both fine." he walked around the bed so he could see her face "Why did this happen to us?" she tore her eyes away from the wall and looked at Phil.

He sat on the bed and she moved over making room for him "I don't know, Lil. I really don't." Phil could feel his own tears starting to form "You guys didn't deserve this" he put his arms around his sister and she started crying harder. "I'm so sorry, Lillian. I really am."


	9. Grieving

_**Chapter Nine: Grieving**_

They spent ten more days at the hospital, hoping that the baby in the NICU would make it. But they didn't get good news. Their baby got an infection and passed away.

Lil wasn't talking to anyone. She wouldn't even leave the house. She would just walk around the apartment and eat. Tommy would say something to her and she would snap. Kimi and Phil tried to keep Grace away from their apartment so it wouldn't make them feel bad. Phil also avoided his sister for a while. He knew how she got when she was depressed, and it scared him. Not in a bad way, but in a she could kill him, kind of way.

Tommy and Lil were going to bed that night and he was trying to tell her something. "Lillian, will you look at me?" he asked reaching over to touch her shoulder.

Lil turned and glared at him "Don't. Touch. Me."

"Are you kidding me, Lil?"

Lil sat up and turned to look at him "Do you not understand, Tommy? I just lost-"

"No, Lillian. _We _just lost two babies. Not only you. Those were _our _babies."

Lil could feel the tears starting to form again "You aren't the one that had to carry them around! I'm hurting, Tommy. The least you could do is be there"

Tommy rolled his eyes and threw the covers off him and getting out of the bed "You aren't the only one hurting, Lil! It's not all about _you_!" Tommy left the room.

Lil sat in the bed and listened until she heard a door slam shut. She had no idea where Tommy was going but at this point she didn't care. She wiped away the tears and laid back down, putting one of her arms over her face.

Phil and Kimi were coming back from picking Grace up when they ran into Tommy in the parking lot. He had tears in his eyes and it worried them. "T, what's wrong?"

Tommy turned to look at them "Your sister is what's wrong." he said before he turned back around and got to his car.

Phil and Kimi looked at each other before they hurried inside. Tommy and Lil had never been the couple to walk away from each other when they were in a fight. So seeing Tommy actually leave really worried them, and he didn't seem so too happy.

Phil and Kimi walked into Lil's apartment and walked over to her room, Kimi stopping in the living to put Grace on the couch. She was still laying with her arm over her face and she was sobbing. "Lillian, what happened?"

She moved her arm and looked over at them. They walked over and sat on the bed. She sat up, putting hear back against the headboard and looked at them "He got mad at me for being hurt and he accused me of thinking it was all about me"

Phil said and moved closer to her "Did he _really _get mad at you or do you just think he did?"

"I'm pretty sure he did! I'm not stupid, Phillip. I told him I was hurting and the least he could do was be there and he told me I wasn't the only one hurting and that its 'not all about me' and then he left."

Phil and Kimi both sighed "You have to remember, just months ago, his dad died. Now, he lost his children. Just imagine how he must be feeling, Lil. Take how bad you're hurting and times that by ten. That's how bad he's hurting." Kimi said and put a hand on her shoulder "I also think you're snapping at him all the time because you have postpartum depression. Trust me, I hated Phil after Grace was born." Lil looked over at Phil and he shrugged and nodded "It'll pass. I'm here for you, Phil is and when Tommy comes back he will be."

Lil looked down at her hands as her tears were now streaming down her face "_If _he comes back... I've been so caught up in how I was feeling, I didn't even think of how he must be feeling... I completely forgot that his dad died." She started crying harder and she pulled her knees to her chest "I'm such a horrible wife!"

Kimi pushed Phil out of her way and put an arm around her "You are not! That kind of thing happens when you have postpartum depression. Just please take my advice and when Tommy gets back, go get some help."

"Kimi... What if he doesn't come back?"

Kimi gave her a smile "Tommy loves you. You guys had a fight and he was hurt. He'll be back."

"Are you sure?" Lil asked wiping the tears away.

"Positive." she gave Lil another hug "Get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

Lil nodded and then gave Phil a hug. He wasn't really much help, but at least he was there. She laid back down and watched as they walked out. Instead of going to sleep she rolled over and stared at the wall, hoping Tommy would come home soon.

She had finally fallen asleep and was woken up to someone putting a hand on her waist. She turned over and looked at who it was. She was too tired to get up but she put a smile on "I'm glad you're here." she could tell he was hesitating about having his hand on her. She took one of her hands and placed it on his arm "I'm really sorry."

"Me too." he said. She could hear it in his voice that he was still upset over what happened.

"It's just... I completely forgot what happened to you and I'm just a-" Lil stopped talking. She stopped because he was now pressing his lips to hers.

"I don't want to talk about it. We're both sorry and I missed you."

"Where did you go?" she asked moving closer to him.

"I went to talk to someone who would calm me down."

"Who?"

"Angelica."

Lil smiled and put her head on Tommy's chest "Will you take me to talk to a doctor tomorrow?"

Tommy wrapped his arms around her "Anything for you."


End file.
